Denver Direct: Kewl Move

Tent State’s Adam Jung, nominee for the MPYO award, announced Wednesday that the Tenters, forced to leave City Park each night at 11:00 pm due to the rigid enforcement of the No-Sleeping-In-The-Parks-Ever ordinance, will walk to the Pepsi center, where they will seek refuge in the City-erected Freedom Cage. This is a majorly kewl move and will end each night with a long stroll to the Pepsi Center and a Pajama Party in the Cage.

City Mocked
Jung continued, “But we were not seeing the big picture. The city of Denver does not oppose free speech. They love free speech so much they just want to protect and secure it with razor wire and caging. Because of their passion for the First Amendment the city has provided one place for demonstrators to be overnight – the freedom cage. Each night demonstrators will take the freedom cage and transform it into the ‘Freedomville Shantytown.’ ”

How big is the Freedom Cage?
Answer = 50,000 sq/ft.
Sleeping bag = 3 x 7 = 21 sq/ft
50,000 / 21 = 2,380 = sleeping capacity of Freedom Cage.
Tenters must get cozy, perhaps double up.

Managing Safety
“We have to give the police the ability to act in certain circumstances where the intent the circumstances is clear, to act before something happens,” LaCabe said, somewhat unclearly.

But did you get that, the Manager of Safety, LaCage, wants to preempt “something” that may be going to happen. Oh boy, he won’t be disappointed. The way things are going, “something” is definitely going to happen. It always does.

Why protest at DNC?? Well, for one, have the Democrats stopped the WAR? Nooooo. Or impeded it in any way with off-the-table Pelosi in charge? Noooo. Will the Democrats’ own children being gassed and hauled off to the Freedom Jail get their attention? Yessss.

So I say right-on to the Tenters, and the SDSers (are they still around?) and the others. But what about the perves and creeps who just want to “sleep with” the coeds. The kids seem to prefer that homeless look, so maybe the perves can get away with it. (What’s that tent in your sleeping bag?) I hope the perves don’t get outed and beaten to a pulp inside the Freedom Cage. I mean, it’s not that free in there. And what if the cops wade in to rescue the perve? Oh, boy, we got us a love fest in a cage.

WASHINGTON — Federal and local authorities are girding for huge protests, mammoth traffic tie-ups and civil disturbances at the Democratic National Convention in Denver this month, fearing that the convention will become a magnet for militant protest groups.

Madison Optimistic
“I personally choose to be optimistic, and I choose to believe that everyone wants to have peaceful demonstrations,” Councilwoman Carla Madison said. “I can be optimistic, and you can be optimistic. But it’s not the job of the police to be optimistic.” Madison said, swirling the tent that she now carries with her over her head and dancing away.